Ruminations of an Indian Idle mind!

Sometimes I find even Fat boy slim songs soul-stirring. I do not know where I am heading to, what I want from life. Just few songs here and there, a night spent staring at the ceiling admiring the carvings and the artistic taste of people in Rohtak, buying Rohtak made swiss chocolates for my cousin’s son and ending up finishing one packet all by myself…..a bunch of more tired souls all around….I go to office and then I think…no I don’t think, I just keep myself occupied, smiling faces around…people doing what they are best at and enjoying…people talking about so many things and how to make a crore by the time you are 40…and then I doing my calculations and coming down to my 2010-11 CTC and being happy about it….speaking to people in bombay who make their own work and feel their own time…..as I come back to the hum of my ac with a gunjee on….things change and I start writing…just about trying to……Farmville is over…people putting random status messages on FB, some more people finding further more time to comment on them..somebody asking me why haven’t you changed your photo on orkut, its been there since a long time..and I ask myself why did I put a photo at the first place…its an art to keep writing without thinking much…and I fail at it miserably…just writing what comes to mind on a Monday night with few people incessantly pinging on gtalk….time to have a chat with them…I don’t know why I do it, but the fact is I do it….

The Red Book!

That day when I was traveling in a train, and it had been a while since I had read something meaningful, I laid my hands on that something! On the seat in front of me, somebody had left a red book! A red book, well read could have reddened my journey all the more!! Thinking that, I started flipping through the pages.

After a curious glance, I realized that it’s a story of a lone traveler sitting in a train, trying to break the recursive loop of puzzles in his life. And right when the traveler’s mind starts sorting everything out, he lays his hands on a red book, right on the seat in front of him.

Inside that red book that the traveler goes through, there is a story of one gentleman sitting on a bench on a crowded platform reading a red book.

With so many red books all around, physically and mentally, I decide to take some time out!

I look out of the window to read the name of the station where the train has just halted and I see an old, disheveled man restless, sitting on the platform. Looking at his restlessness, with the red book in my hand, I get down at the station and head towards him. He rises from the bench and gives me a familiar smile, saying – “I was waiting for you Sir! Can I have my red book back! I have been reading it on this crowded platform since I was ten.” I say “but I haven’t completed it.” He says “That’s your destiny Sir, You were supposed to read it till here only!” Just when I think of continuing the argument, I notice that my train’s just started whistling away! I run hard, get back to my seat and head towards sleep, straightaway!

By the time I get up, I am two stations ahead , with neighbors on the seats all around! I look at all of them and suddenly notice a familiar face smiling at me. I tell him – Sir, Ive seen you somewhere. He says – “With parted hair and a neat trim, I always look much familiar.” I see a red book in his hand, and out of an already thriving curiousity, ask him – “Sir, what is this red book about?” He tells me – “It’s the journey of an old man who used to read a red book on the bench of a crowded railway platform from the age of ten”. I shake my head to check if I am dreaming, and I suddenly get up from my sleep. I realize I am four stations ahead and the neighbourers are still sitting all around, with just one member missing! But he sure does leave the red book for me to read! What would that red book be about? Is it going to be a story of an average bloke, a commoner who forgets a red book in a train?

With much curiousity and the realization that it has been a long while since I have read something meaningful, I lay my hands on that red book on the seat in front of me. After all, a red book, well read could redd my life all the more………….

कुछ व्यंग्य - " नया टी वी"

पूरी दिन की थकावट से चूर जब मैं दफ्तर से घर वापस आया

मैंने अपनी आखों के सामने एक नया टी वी सेट पाया

आंटी बोली "ये तो आपके लिए हमने किया बहुत थोड़ा है "

"चिंता मत कीजिये , इसका भाड़ा कमरे के किराए में नहीं जोड़ा है "

मैंने कहा आंटी ऐसे ही रहे मेरे सर पर आपका आशीर्वाद

टी वी और ऐसी ही आगे की सहूलियतों के लिए पहले से धन्यवाद !

आंटी के जाते ही हमने पैर पसारे और बड़े उत्साह से टी वी चलाया

चलाते ही छरहरे बदन वाला एक प्रौढ़ व्यक्ति चिल्लाया

" जाग जाओ, चैन की नींद सोना है तो जाग जाओ !"

वो दे रहा था किसी अपराधी का विवरण

जिसने किया था पैसों के लिए किसी का अपहरण

उस छरहरे व्यक्ति की आवाज़ और आव-भाव देख मैं घबराया

अपराधी से कहीं अधिक खतरनाक मैंने उसे पाया

मैंने कहा ऐसे प्रोग्राम देखने से अच्छा तो जाना नर्क है

भाई, जागरूकता और दहशत फैलाने में भी आख़िर फर्क है

ऐसी बकवास सुनने से अच्छा तो टी वी करना बंद है

पर दिल बोला ठहरो! छरहरा बदन होते हुए भी, बन्दे की आवाज़ तो बुलंद है !

आधे घंटे तक प्रोग्राम देखने के बाद जब मैं सो पाया

सारी रात भर डरावने सपनों में ख़ुद को चोरों से घिरा हुआ पाया

सुबह जब आँख खुली और मैंने टी वी चलाया

बंद डब्बे को देख कर पता लगा किसी ने टी वी का केबल है हटाया

मैंने कहा आंटी जी, केबल का पैसा क्या आपने नहीं है भरवाया

आंटी बोलीं, लगता है बेटा केबल तो किसी चोर ने है चुराया

सुनते ही मेरा दिल घबराया

उस छरहरे व्यक्ति का चेहरा दुबारा आखों के सामने आया

मैं तो चैन की नींद से जाग चुका था !!!

उन डरावने सपनों से दूर भाग चुका था !!!

दिल ने कहा चलो इस छरहरे व्यक्ति से तो मिला छुटकारा

"मैं नया केबल लगवा दूँगी" आंटी ने प्यार से पुचकारा

उस दिन दफ्तर से लौट कर मैंने टी वी सही सलामत पाया

ईश्वर का नाम लेते हुए उसे फ़िर से चलाया

चलाते ही छरहरे बदन वाला व्यक्ति फ़िर मचा रहा था शोर

"रात को रोहतक की सड़कों पे घूम रहा है केबल चोर"

दिखा रहा था वो कोई स्पेशल रिपोर्ट

अपने घर की फोटो और आंटी का इंटरव्यू देख लगी दिल पे गहरी चोट

मन ने कहा काश आज रविवार होता

भारत भर के न्यूज़ चैनलों की स्पेशल रिपोर्ट में आंटी के साइड में मैं भी खड़ा होता

यही सोच कर दिल हंसा मंद-मंद

चोर की वजह से ही सही, टी वी पे आना किसे नहीं पसंद !

एक विचार निः शुल्क (कृपया इन्टरनेट एक्स्प्लोरर में देखें)

एक आकारहीन और अस्थायी विचार
अनियमितताओं के बीच अपना रूप ढूंढता हुआ

है लघु पर निर्बल नहीं
है अविकसित पर असहाय नहीं,
है चंचल, है कुशल, है उदार,
है दृढ़, है निरंतर, है प्रभावशाली
जब समय के साथ सब कुछ परिवर्तनशील है , कौमार्य से पहले संभवतः यह भी परिवर्तित होगा
अंततः किसी क्रिया में बदल जाएगा, जिसका परिणाम मैं भोंगुंगा


न जाने कितने असंख्य विचार दिन प्रतिदिन आते हैं इस मस्तिष्क में और मुझसे क्या क्या करवाते हैं,
ये विचार ही मेरी आधारशिला के स्तम्भ हैं, ये ही मुझे विद्वान बनाते हैं

Ek Vichaar - Nih-Shulk ! (Hindi)

Ek aakaarheen aur asthaayi vichaar

Aniyamittaoon ke beech apna roop dhoondhta hua,

Hai laghu par Nirbal nahin,

Hai aviksit par asahaay nahin,

Hai chanchal, Hai kushal, Hai udaar,

Hai dridh, Hai nirantar, Hai prabhavshaali

Jab samay ke saath sab kuchh parivartansheel hai, Kaumrya se pehle sambhavtah ye bhi parivartit hoga

Antatah kisi kriya me badal jaayega, jiska parinaam main bhogunga.

Na jaane kitne asankhya vichaar din pratidin aate hain is mastishk me, aur mujhse kya kya karvaate hain...

Ye vichaar hi meri aadhaarshila ke stambh hain, ye hi mujhe Vidwaan banate hain......

The Global Slumdog Indian

One of my juniors recently went to Spain on her honeymoon and a Hispanic out of the blue asked her – Oh you are from India, you have slums and all, how cool!!…and incidentally I also feel that my junior looks a lot like how kiddo Latika (Rubina Ali) will look when she grows up. So, I don’t blame the Hispanic for relating so well with her…First time you meet an Indian and slums are his biggest identity.

Another of my good friends and a fellow batchmate participated in the assessment center of one big company in London. All other participants in the assessment center belonged to different ethnicities and there was this one British Woman taking keen interest in my friend and all his confidence which was bespattered all so badly in the assessment center was restored by the attention he was getting from her. As he narrated to me, some Britishers are too intrigued by Indians and you can even expect questions like “Were you born Indian by choice or by chance?”, (and thankfully this woman didn’t dare to ask this question in Haryana, coz here she’d have received everything else but the answer.) Looking at the undue attention, my poor friend thought his bad days were finally over. He shall no more be one of those howling “bystander” dogs making mating calls for other dogs and female dogs (the more popular word for female dogs is now synonymous with Human Beings, so I spared the dog species from that word) to make love. However, as Slumdog Millionnaire had not released by then, all his premature hormonal dysfunctions were not well reciprocated, although he looked like what Dev Patel (protagonist of Slumdog) would look once he reaches puberty. Ohh, he is 18? Ohh..Ok..